The Tale of Lily Evan's Boyfriends
by imnotjkr
Summary: This is the untold story of the unfortunate men who dated the ever famous Lily Evans. They wouldn't have been unfortunate if James Potter hadn't gotten involved. Now !COMPLETE! I'm so happy.
1. Harry Sullivan

**Disclaimer**: _If I owned Harry Potter, do you seriously think I would be writing a disclaimer?_

**Chapter1: Harry Sullivan**

"James Potter, get your butt down here NOW!" Lily Evans shrieked, running into the Gryffindor Common Room.

"What'd I do now?" James asked, coming down the stairs from the boy's dormitories with his best friend Sirius Black. They nodded at Remus Lupin, another of their friends. He was currently hiding behind a book. Lily's temper was infamous and he hoped James wouldn't drag him into their argument, again.

The entire Common Room was watching with interest. Lily and James' arguments usually were very entertaining and watching James' rejection was always interesting. You would have thought he'd have stopped asking her out during arguments. Mind you, that was the only time she ever conversed with him.

"What did you do! What did you do!" Lily was muttering distractedly. "I'll tell you what you did!" She suddenly screamed. "YOU THREATENED TO BEAT MY BOYFRIEND UP IF HE DIDN'T BREAK UP WITH ME!"

James didn't appear at all shocked by this outburst and answered perfectly calmly, "I did no such thing. Sirius did."

Sirius had got a front row seat to watch, but went and stood by James' shoulder at this remark. "I didn't do it. Remus did."

Remus shuddered. He should have known if James hadn't brought him in, Sirius would. "Umm….Peter did?" he suggested cautiously, quickly and quietly. But before anyone could move, he raced out of the Common Room and to the library, as fast as his legs could carry him. Peter Pettigrew was a chubby, insignificant boy. He wasn't particularly skilful and wouldn't still be at Hogwarts if it hadn't been for the other Marauders. But even they couldn't keep him from getting hexed as many times as he was by bad tempered Slytherins. He was currently in the hospital wing after he had mysteriously sprouted feelers.

Lily suddenly seemed to have recovered herself. "AS IF ANYONE WOULD BE THREATENED BY PETTIGREW!" She turned back to James. "If you want to be hexed to oblivion then do this again. But I won't keep my temper next time." With this dire warning, she started up the Girls' Staircase. She turned half-way up the stairs as James drew breath. "And no, Potter, I will not go out with you."

As soon as she reached the top James visibly deflated, staring at the point where she had disappeared. Sirius patted him on his back. "You shouldn't have threatened him, mate."

"Umm…. Let's visit P…umm…eter, Peter," James responded, struggling to bring his attention to the here and now.

Sirius immediately picked up on his hurt and despondency, but knew better than to mention it or ask the cause. Not that he didn't know the cause, of course. Lily Evans. Sirius often wondered what James saw in her, but knew better than to try and understand. He didn't think he ever would.

"Let's go see Peter. Wonder if he still has his feelers?" Sirius' voice was marinated in mischief. He and James left the common room chuckling.


	2. Mark Smith

**Disclaimer**:_ Would I spend my time writing fan fiction if I was the successful author of the Harry Potter series_?

**Chapter 2: Mark Smith**

"James Arthur Potter, you come down here right now before I kick your sorry arse from here to kingdom come!" Lily Evans shrieked. All those in the Common Room stared at her as she entered. No one had heard her curse before. Mind you, if anyone could make curse it would be…

"James A. Potter, at your service", James gloated with a bow and a smile. "How may I serve you fair Lillian, though you must remember to mind your language?"

"Oh, and you can talk," scoffed Lily. "And really, where the hell do you get off? You die Mark's hair bright pink, and of course that's _before_ you gave him antlers. And then, to top it off, you say that he'll get much worse if he goes on a date with me. So really Potter, where the hell do you get off?" Lily's hair seemed to crackle with anger.

"Is that all?"

"Is that all." Lily seemed slightly dazed. Then quick as a flash she recovered. "Is that all you can say, Mr I'm-Just-Ruining-Your-Life Potter. Of course that's all, stupid. Hang on a sec…. WHAT ELSE HAVE YOU DONE!"

"Now Lillian, dear, DO calm down. I merely told Mark I-Know-Everything Smith," here someone snickered, but the look Lily sent around the Common Room quelled any desire to laugh. "That if he ate something Peter offered him, he would regret it. Being the type of stupid idiot he is, he ate it. It was hexed. That's how he got the pink hair and antlers." James explained. His eyes seemed to have glazed over momentarily at the memory, but he quickly snapped out of it. "When he complained I added that it was nothing compared to what I could do if he, say, dated a girl I liked. I never mentioned you."

"By name, but it was obvious to everyone he was talking about you." Sirius had been quiet, until this moment but had obviously decided to make his presence known. He called this out from his seat by the fire with the other marauders.

"Thanks Padfoot," James called sarcastically back. "That's _so_ helping"

"You're welcome Prongs, old buddy" Sirius stated happily.

Lily seemed to have been trying to hold herself in. At this point she exploded. "YOU DO THIS AGAIN AND YOU ARE **_DEAD MEAT_**!" she screamed, before running up the stairs. James appeared unaffected by this outburst, even though it felt like she had stabbed him roughly with each syllable. He went and sat with the rest of the marauders. All but Sirius believed the disguise.

"Well that went well, considering." Remus finally declared.

"Considering what?" James asked, warily.

"That she hates you." Remus explained.

James put his head in his hands, but they could still hear his muffled, sarcastic comment. "Thanks Moony. I _really_ needed to hear _that_."


	3. Amos Diggory

Disclaimer: Check out the user name.

**Chapter 3: Amos Diggory**

"POTTER!" Lily yelled, upon entering the practically empty Common Room. "Get down here!"

"Right here," was James' melancholy response from the couch by the fire. He didn't even turn around, but he sounded like he had been crying.

"What's wrong?" Lily was worried. James was a social person who loved food and he had skipped dinner to sit all alone in the Common Room and stare at the fire. She sat down next to him and he turned to her.

"I got an owl. From my parents. There was a Death Eater Attack. My Aunt Mildred, Uncle Fred and their daughter Jezebel are……they're….." James broke out in noisy sobs, tears trickling down from his red puffy eyes.

"They didn't make it," Lily finished. She patted James on the back, forgetting this was her enemy since the boat ride, forgetting what he'd done that day, forgetting everything but an overwhelming sense of sympathy. "Just remember their in a better place now, with out war and anger and hurt. Just cry it all out. It's OK. How close were you?"

"I hadn't seen them for years. My family's on the top of Voldemort's hit list so it's not like we have time to organize family reunions. But it makes everything more real. This war is here and now and people are dying. Sirius I can look after, but my parents. We're here and my parents are Merlin knows where and I can't help them. What if it wasn't Fred it was my dad? What if it wasn't Mildred, it was my mum? I'm scared, I'm so scared."

"Shhh, it's OK to be scared. I'm scared. Hell, I bet even Dumbledore's scared. But we can't live our lives in fear. We've got to fight back. Fighting back for what we believe in. It's the only way to keep going tomorrow."

Suddenly, she felt uncomfortably close to James and started mumbling something about going to bed or getting Remus. James immediately knew what was going on, probably because she had gone bright red. He chuckled

"I promise I'll keep my hands to myself," he stated through the laughter.

"Well it's you," Lily was flustered. "You'd probably hit on someone on your death bed."

James decided that now was a good time to change the subject as he wasn't exactly comfortable with shielded people. "You know Amelia Henrikson," he started.

"Yeah." Lilly answered dubiously.

"Do you think she's interested in Sirius, 'cause he definitely likes her. And I don't mean broom closet likes, I mean proper fancies. He was absolutely furious for a month after Jake Thompson asked her out to Hogsmeade, and he started singing at bizarre moments for a week after he heard they'd broken up. And that's subtle compared to the rest of the obvious hints. Well, only the marauders pick up on them cause we know the real Sirius, not the mask he shows the rest of the world."

Lily was shocked by this. "Why doesn't he just ask her out then?" she asked, completely confused.

"Ah, well Sirius has this weird philosophy. If you ask out girls who you don't care about then you don't care if you get turned down."

Lily, suddenly breathless, asked, "And what do you think?"

James answered without a second thought, like he had wanted to say this for many years now, "well if you put you heart on the line, it should be for someone special."

As he said that, Lily felt that they were close, too close. Like he could read her mind, James suddenly stood up, "Well I'm gonna get to bed before the guys get back from dinner, I'm not sure if I could face them yet." He took of to the stairs but stopped, inches from the first crimson, carpeted step. "Oh, and by the way," he started. "It _was _me who turned Amos into a canary. Thought it would match his robes see." At this he ran as fast as his legs could carry him to his dormitory.

Lily considered chasing after him, but decided against it. Just this once.

* * *

AN: Thanks to Yingfa Dreamer, BlondeGinny05, ashbaer, FyAnnwn, just another harry potter fan, King for a day Princess by dawn and QueenCate for their story alerts, favourites and reviews. I'm about to start a new fic, The Ball, and another, Catherine Smith, but I'll make sure I still try and update regularly. 


	4. Jake Thompson

Disclaimer: FOR THE LAST TIME, I'M NOT J K ROWLING!

**Chapter 4: Jake Thompson**

"POTTER," Lily yelled from her place on the couch. James, who had just come through the portrait hole, looked up guiltily. It appeared to everyone that he had tried to avoid this moment. Everyone had come down when they heard a fuming Lily slam the portrait closed and no one had gone to bed since. Lily and James' fights had been in short supply as they had been on reasonably good terms since Amos mysteriously turned into a canary and dumped Lily.

"Uhh, hey Lils," James started. "Fancy seeing you here."

"Well why on earth would you expect to see me when you TURNED MY BOYFRIEND IN TO AN OCTOPUS, James. I don't see why I would be looking for you, do you?" Lily's voice had a chill in it, but she also appeared to be trying very hard not to laugh. Most people thought they were mistaking the glint in her eyes, when actually they were spot on with their original assumption.

"Well, you see…uhh," James looked very uncomfortable and his hands were twisting by his waist. "Well _only_ until he agreed to dump you. It _was_ only for about a minute."

"But as he turned away I gave him bunny ears," No one was sure where Sirius Black had come from, but he was certainly was here now and ha was a major part of the conversation.

James winked at Lily, though everyone missed it but its intended recipient who responded with a deep blush that no one missed or understood. "But Sirius, I thought you liked him? Why would you do that to such a nice chap?" He seemed genuinely concerned, but no one knew the grin that was threatening to engulf his face. This was what all those hours of planning had been for.

"Well, I haven't liked him since he asked Amelia out…" Sirius started before jumping about a mile in the air and running up the stairs. He seemed to have realised that everyone was in the Common Room, including Amelia Henrikson who was now a shade of deep scarlet, and they could all hear him.

Suddenly, both Lily and James burst out laughing and were soon doubled up in giggles. When they both came back to their senses they high-fived. No one understood and watched this exchange with increasing bewilderment.

"Good plan," Lily complimented. "I didn't think he'd actually do it though."

"Ahh, but I am the best," James teased good naturedly. "Maybe he didn't think you'd ask out a guy he didn't like with the express purpose of making him admit he fancied someone."

"I didn't know you had such good acting skills, you looked so guilty, I almost believed you had done something. Well other than turn Jake into an octopus. You know, I'm going to go apologise to him" and without another word she headed out of the Portrait Hole.

"See ya," James called after her before haeding off to talk to his best friend.

Everyone in the Common Room looked at each other with increasing astonishment, except Remus and Peter who headed up the stair s to talk to Sirius.


	5. James Potter

Disclaimer: I am not J. K. Rowling. If I was I would be on holiday in the Bahamas, before returning to my mansion. Sadly, it is only a fantasy.

**Chapter 5: James Potter**

Lily sat alone in the Prefects carriage and pondered the thing that kept coming into the head. James Potter. What was he? Prankster or Serious, Kind or Mean, Enemy, Friend or …more than that.

The day after her and Amos' break-up, she'd gone to see HIM. James. They'd been a bit awkward at first, but soon became completely at ease in each others company. They'd meet in the Room of Requirement at 7 every night to just chat. They thought it best to keep their new found friendship just between the two of them. No need to make it all any more complicated.

Then they'd had an idea. Sirius deserved to get together with the girl of his dreams. So they'd made a plan. She asked Jake out. James would go and do something to him and ask Sirius to help him. Sirius would do something extra and talk about it when she confronted James. Then James would get him to admit his feelings for her and they'd live happily ever after.

Well, at first she just wanted to see Sirius happy, but then she began to enjoy the time she spent with James more and more. She'd actually put off asking Jake out for a week so that she could spend more time with him. He was dreamy and cute and affectionate and kind and perfect boyfriend material. So she had a little crush, that wasn't actually that little.

They'd been owling each other all holiday. Her and James. Sirius and Amelia were dating. She and James were Head Students. There was a war. Petty Tuna Face was getting married to a walrus. And all she could think about was that James hadn't asked her out for 3 months. And she hated it. She wanted to be able to say yes and they'd date and then one day they'd say they loved each other. And then he'd propose and they'd get married and they'd go on a honeymoon. And then they'd have kids and teach them to walk and talk and play Quidditch.

The sound of the door opening stopped her daydream there. When she saw a flushed and windswept James enter the compartment she blushed. He looked at her bizarrely and she blushed even more.

"Hey" he started. "It's really great to see you again. Listen, there's something I've got to tell you after the meeting." He ran his hand through his hair nervously. Lily, at that moment, wanted nothing more than to stroke his hair too. Stupid hormones, she thought, so hard to resist. "It's kind of important."

"Why don't you just tell me now, the prefect meeting doesn't start for half an hour?"

"Oh yeah, silly me," James' voice was about two octaves higher than it had been a few seconds ago. "Well, you see, umm…" He didn't know what to say. He saw her face, her beautiful face, and all thought left his head. He needed her, he wanted her, and he … loved her. That was it. That was all he needed. Ever, forever, she was all he needed. He loved her.

He'd been planning this romantic speech for days. Your more than special, I'd do anything for you, those words didn't come close to describing what he felt for her. It was too strong. She was too … perfect, beautiful, kind, wonderful. There were no words to describe it.

He did the only thing he could think of. Their faces got closer and closer until their lips touched. Lily's hands ran through his hair as he gently ran his hands down her back, resting at her waist.

And the prefects chose that moment to enter. They looked so shocked to see the former enemies kissing like there was no tomorrow. One of the braver prefects cleared his throat. James and Lily stopped the kiss at the same moment and stepped away. Neither seemed to notice or care that their clothes were creased or their hair was messy or that they had just been caught kissing by a large group of students, who would like nothing more than to get them in trouble for a public display of affection.

"So everyone, please take a seat." Lily Evans suggested with a gigantic smile on her face.

"Now we're your heads this year" James Potter stared with a goofy grin on his face.

And at that moment, they both knew that whatever happened they would face it, together.

* * *

A/N And that's the end. I hope you enjoyed it cause I certainly enjoyed writing it. I hope you check out some of my other stories and review. Toodle-oo

I'mnotjkr


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